I learnt this week that it only takes a split second for terrible things to happen. I've wished a thousand times since Tuesday morning that I could turn back time. To the first time I saw the little cat crawl through the small gap in the partition between my balcony and my neighbours. The danger was apparent immediately. My unsecured balcony was no place for a cat to be, my neighbour has nets on hers. But I put it off because that would mean no more visits from the cat. It's only an occasional thing and cats are sure-footed, thought I. But it ran in on Tuesday in the rain, jumped onto a wet ledge, shook itself and slipped. All in a moment. My heart stopped. Every single moment since then I've wished I could go back in time. And somehow stop this from happening. I wish, I wish, I wish......
I worked up the courage to meet my neighbour today. She tells me this is the second time this has happened. Previous neighbour, another cat, different sequence of events, same 5-inch gap. She's just as consumed with regret as me, I realise. There are things we both could have done to prevent this, had we acted in time. Mostly me - all I had to do was to alert her to the danger. But nothing will bring the cat back now. I've never felt worse. .
Wednesday, December 6, 2023
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